When Care Becomes Self-Neglect: Understanding the Silent Burnout Among Women Caregivers

In societies across the world, women are often socialized to prioritize the needs of others before their own. As caregivers, professionals, mothers, partners, and friends, women frequently embody roles that demand emotional, physical, and psychological labor. Over time, however, this outward focus can lead to profound self-neglect, a phenomenon increasingly documented in psychological and sociological research.

Women who dedicate themselves to caring for others often suppress their own needs in order to maintain stability within their families, communities, or workplaces (Gilligan, 1982). Many internalize the belief that their worth is tied to their ability to give, a dynamic reinforced by cultural narratives valorizing self-sacrifice (Held, 2006). As a result, even highly capable, successful women may gradually lose connection to their inner emotional world, experiencing symptoms of exhaustion, numbness, and identity erosion (Maslach & Leiter, 2016).

This pattern is not simply a matter of personal choice; it reflects systemic structures that undervalue women's well-being. Care work—whether formal or informal—is often invisible, unpaid, and taken for granted (Tronto, 1993). Without spaces for reflection, support, and recognition, many women find themselves trapped in cycles of giving that leave little room for self-replenishment.

Psychological research suggests that chronic self-neglect can lead to compassion fatigue, depression, and even serious physical health consequences (Figley, 1995; Neff, 2003). Recovery often begins with acknowledgment: recognizing that caring for oneself is not selfish but a vital act of self-preservation. Building supportive communities, seeking therapeutic support, and cultivating self-compassion are essential steps in restoring balance.

At FeelSafeHub, we honor the unseen labor of women who care. We believe that healing begins when women feel witnessed, valued, and safe enough to prioritize their own emotional and physical well-being.

References

• Figley, C. R. (1995). Compassion fatigue: Coping with secondary traumatic stress disorder in those who treat the traumatized. Brunner-Routledge.

• Gilligan, C. (1982). In a Different Voice: Psychological Theory and Women's Development. Harvard University Press.

• Held, V. (2006). The Ethics of Care: Personal, Political, and Global. Oxford University Press.

• Maslach, C., & Leiter, M. P. (2016). Burnout: A Multidimensional Perspective. Taylor & Francis.

• Neff, K. D. (2003). Self-compassion: An alternative conceptualization of a healthy attitude toward oneself. Self and Identity, 2(2), 85–101.

• Tronto, J. C. (1993). Moral Boundaries: A Political Argument for an Ethic of Care. Routledge.